Greetings from Elena's Father

Elena's father sends his greeting to all on October 30th.

Hi, Michele!

Allow me to congratulate you, your relatives and friends with a wonderful holiday - the day of all saints day Halloween !!!
Let your house reigns joy, laughter and always cheerful mood.
Good luck to you, and to always optimistic in life you have worked.
Convey greetings and congratulations Kathie Beach, Doris .... All who talked with Lena.
Thank you that you have helped us in many ways.

Sincerely,
Nicholay Lobodin

Elena with her nephew in Vladivostok, 2008

When Dave Left

I'll never forget Elena calling after Dave filed for divorce and got his own place.  She called because she was afraid of being alone in her house and she asked if I would come over for at least a little while.

I went over and she was emotionally exhausted.  Everything was changing and Dave left no food in her fridge.  I think she had a couple of hot dogs and condiments and literally nothing else.

She got tired and I said, "sleep!" with a smile.  When she fell asleep I did some work around her kitchen and then I quietly went home.

This is the video I put on my facebook the day I learned that she had died from the Statesman Journal, as a memory of this moment.  It's from my favorite tv show, where the lead character gains a younger girlfriend who is originally from Russia.

My Statement During the Sentencing

(This is what I said to the court on behalf of Elena.)

Elena didn't deserve what you did. I feel like what you have done is manipulative. Remember the day you filed for divorce and you and I talked on the phone about it? Instead of talking about divorce, you were doing all you could to see her deported. I said, "You can't just make a person disappear, Dave."

It doesn't work that way. Elena has rights. I read your divorce paperwork which said you were going to pay her no alimony even though by international law you owe her that, I found out. And you were going to charge all your attorney fees to her. But Elena has rights. I am not sure that you ever understood that.

Elena was a wonderful person who was fun and simple and truly caring for other people. She wasn't perfect, and through time for a reason I cannot understand, her condition worsened. But our bond went very deep, deeper than most anyone I've befriended in a particular way. We both had abuse in our past, and I couldn't help but connect at that level with her. She would never stand up for her rights. I don't know if it's cultural or not. So I was only a few steps ahead of her, helping her with this.

I cannot tell you how much it meant to me to find lawyers who would take her case as unusual as her circumstances were. I thought once she got the legal help she needed, the truth would come out and she would be safe. But you stole that from us all. You made plans to harm her and frame her, you say. So in a sense, you had your way. You have made her disappear as you always wanted, but I will tell you, you did not win.

Let's discern this soberly. Satan comes to kill. God comes to us to give life and give it abundantly. Whatever it has been in other times in your life, it has been Satan who has been at work through you regarding Elena, not God. "In this the children of God and the children of the Devil are manifest: Whoever does not practice righteousness is not of God, nor is he who does not love his brother. For this is the message you heard from the beginning, that we should love one another, not as Cain who was of the wicked one and murdered his brother. Whoever hates his brother is a murderer, and you know that no murderer has eternal life abiding in Him." 1 John 3:10-11,15.

This is why you did not win. With all your plans to harm my friend, other forces were at play. Servants of God are those who serve life and rights to all men, freedom, and the truth. I think of Glennis, and his shepherding care for her. I think of the Women's Crisis Center, who walked her road with her. Her immigration lawyer. I think of Jack and Lindsay and her other lawyers present today. I think of Doris, and the servants at your church who told her the gospel and were confident she accepted it. We served her life and life more abundantly, more securely; we served you too - both of you. Doris even knew at the end as did I, that she accepted the gospel of salvation through Christ at least in our last moments together if not in the beginning of her time here. We are honored and humbled to serve our God.

Elena is a star. She is shining brightly as a full-fledged citizen. Of which country? Her rights of citizenship belong in the Kingdom that goes on forever. She didn't have to measure up to any standards to belong there. She simply accepted the Son of God and in this way, she perfectly fulfills the expectations of the King, and is a shining example of how to do things right. Remember that God said, the first will be last, and the last first? She is a trophy of God's grace - that He gives it so lavishingly on the ungodly. There are no wounds she holds, there are no imperfections she bears. She is an usher of the beautiful grace of God, set in a central place for all to behold.

Dave, can you accept such a place? Do you want to be a citizen of that kingdom, if it means you will forever have to bear the bright light of Elena? Are you willing to come to terms with Elena in heaven, sitting close to God? Can you accept a God and a system of rights where our Savior acts differently than you have, and positions His grace in her? For all eternity she will inescapably be there.

I have told you the truth today because two weeks ago you still excused yourself. I genuinely long to see you turn from what you have served and serve the true God - this God - who also died for you and accepts you this simply as well, if you would simply accept Him. Finally I suggest: accept the lavish grace of God, and serve Him in true righteousness.

As for me, and as for Elena's friends and family, we are well under way. Our choices are just a foretaste of God's plans. She is not disappeared, to us. Her father Nicholai said to me so many times, "Do not forget Elena." Remember her. Several of us have written a blog to remember her. My friends are going to take the restitution money you will be giving to them to make a donation to Simonka House in memory of Elena Eaton. She is my friend, she is my friend, and she will always be my friend. I am proud to have known her. She was like a sister to me. And I love her very much. I still can't believe that she is gone.

Plea and Sentencing

Last Tuesday there was a settlement hearing with David Eaton and his lawyers and the judge and prosecution lawyers (who defend Elena).  For five hours they listened to him when they explained that this should not go to trial because of the evidence coming from David himself.  This evidence came after his Miranda rights were thoroughly explained and read, where he confessed, he discussed his research on poisoning, and he went back to the house and reenacted the murder on camera for the detective.

The reason why it went on so long is that David wanted to be heard regarding her, that she was ruining his life.  He tried to explain that he had no choice but to murder her.  He explained that his charges should be something like manslaughter or something less than murder.  He was not accepting 25 years to life in prison, with no possibility of parole until after the 25 years.

He also had two other charges.  After being imprisoned he secreted a razor from his buttocks and was charged with two counts related to concealing and possession of a weapon.  At maximum these two charges would sentence him to an additional 20 months in prison.

They tried to convince him to not take this to trial by dropping prison time for the weapon charges.

It was not until this morning that I received a call that he is now prepared to plead guilty!  So, he must have had something sink in on how much evidence there was against him.

Therefore there will be no trial, no need to worry about testifying or going through all of this.

Kathie and I would be grateful to see Elena's friends come and support her by attending especially the sentencing scheduled for Tuesday April 1st at 9:00 AM.  Victim's family's statements will be read at that time.  If you want to say something I believe it must be read.  Please send that statement to me.  Kathie is going to try and show a video of Elena to show the judge that this was a real person who was taken from us.

There is also the plea, which is scheduled for this upcoming Monday, the 17th at 10:00 AM.  During that time they will ask David a few questions as to what he knows he is guilty of.

I feel so much RELIEF!

Remembering Elena
1999, 17 years old, the girl in the middle

I remember talking with David on the phone a couple of years ago when he filed for divorce, and he was explaining himself.  I had read with Elena the terms of his divorce in the paperwork she was served, denying her any alimony which she is owed by international law AND he was going to make her pay all his attorney fees.  Instead of discussing the divorce he was discussing with fervency his passion to have her deported (sent back to Russia).  I said to him, "You can't just make a person disappear, Dave."

I will do what I can to remember Elena.

The Good Needs to be Said

When sad news comes I want to say something positive.

I regret sharing the news yesterday, because it is so shocking.  I regret how it must hurt others and not just me.  I hope that getting some answers helps put some things to rest, instead of making things worse.

My friend Elena is a wonderful girl.  I can still see her clearly in my heart like she were here right now.  I don't understand how something like this happened.  When I went to the courthouse yesterday, I tried to be prepared.  As soon as a lawyer talked to me I couldn't help but cry.  I am still confused and still sad.

I was with her at her house often.  She made me coffee.  She was so kind!!  She would offer me something to eat and would dote on me and apologize for any shortcoming which I never felt.  She got ready in the bathroom with me.  She talked about clothes with me.  We did chores around the house together.  I liked those times.

Elena, 17 years old, on the left.

I can remember the good well enough.  I don't think it's fair.  I am proud to share her pictures.  She deserves to be honored.  That's just my feelings.  I know everyone is different.

This life is not all there is.  I am glad that God has her in His hand.  The same God who started the universe in the Big Bang is the same one who said, "I give them eternal life. They will never die, and no one will snatch them from my hand." (John 10:28).  My friend is in the hand of God, and she is in Good Hands.

Motion to Suppress Denied

This morning was a hearing for David Eaton.  He and his lawyer are trying to take every step to give him every chance to get out of the sentence of 25 years in prison.  They tried to suppress particular statements David made after police arrived - which statements I was not able to listen to if they were explicitly said.

Because the officers gave David all his Miranda rights, the judge denied the motion.  This means that things that he said and admitted after being arrested will continue to be used to prosecute him.

A quick rundown of what happened on November 26th, the day Elena was killed.  He was arrested.  He at first did not want to speak to the officers but then a couple hours later decided that he wanted to talk to them.  They made sure he understood that sharing without an attorney was something he did not have to do, and he voluntarily agreed.  He gave an interview and then they took Dave back to the house much later in the day where they did a videotape of a reenactment of what he did.  Later he went to the hospital and gave blood samples and then went back to prison.  All of this happened on that one day.

There will be a trial.  That is unless the judge and the prosecutors can have counsel with David before the trial happens.  A trial like this should never go to trial: there is tons of evidence.  They will try to do everything they can to stop it, but in the end it is David's decision whether there is a trial.  It is in his best interest to have a trial.  If he plead guilty, he would receive the 25 years and there would be no way to alter his sentence for the better.  However if it goes to trial there is a slight chance that things could benefit him such as a sympathetic male juror or a mistrial.  Some time ago he plead not guilty so that a trial could be an option.

David was there in the hearing but he was completely silent and he didn't look at the guest benches when he went by.  He looks like the unabomber.  His beard and hair is grown out.

I have received a subpoena to testify in the trial.

I feel good about what has happened today.

Elena in red, 16 years old
Isn't she a pretty girl?

Simple Girl

I still have your KMARO cd.  Every time I find it I think, "That's right I found it.  I need to return it."  But then I remember I cannot return it to you.  So I assume it is mine, now.  And as I listen I remember hanging out with you.  You loved music.  You were always playing music on your computer, much of it in Russian.  I wish I could remember the name of the artist you liked a lot.

Elena, 1997, 15 years old

I loved how ok you were with being different.  I remember how you would do your hair.  Usually not a lot of effort put into it, but since it is naturally straight, you didn't need to.  Every time I came over you would make me a cup of coffee.  It was awesome how utilitarian you were.  You would pour water into a bowl, heat it in the microwave, and pour from the bowl into a cup of instant grounds, and stir.  Honestly, it left more time for the things that matter.

We always had something we knew we needed to do together.  And it was always different.  I totally enjoyed being right alongside you.  You were happy and fun and we thought the same things being around men and about getting things done.  The simpler, the better.

I never got to learn to cook Russian foods with you and I wish I had.

I still have the clothes and shoes you gave me.  They are wearing out a little bit, but are still good.

I love you and miss your laugh.

-Your friend.